Nearly every morning for the last eight months I have watched myself in the mirror sing at the top of my lungs "Shake It Out" by Florence and the Machine. On days when I am feeling especially adventurous, I move to a full length mirror and dance as well. The girls think it's hilarious and simply view it as part of my morning routine, the way other moms wash their face and brush their teeth (I do those things as well, for the record.)
Honestly, there have been times when those four minutes and thirty eight seconds was the only joy I felt that day. While my girls are a constant source of happiness, the elation they provided me was frequently muddled with fear and guilt and shame regarding the fact that we are now part of the other fifty percent. The part that couldn't keep their families together.
Now that things are better, (I'm better,) I have been tempted to skip my morning singing/dancing/pouring out of my soul and looking deeply into my own eyes in the mirror for nearly five minutes every day. But I honestly enjoy it too much to give it up. If I ever get married again, I hope the guy is able to hang with me and Florence and if I'm lucky, maybe even harmonize a little and dance as well.
PS. Here's a link to "Shake It Out." Go find a mirror and experience your own catharsis.